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Choosing a place to become

When I chose Middlesex University, I was not simply choosing a degree. I was choosing a space that allowed me to become. At the time, I may not have fully understood that, but years later, as I reflect on my journey, I can see it clearly. What drew me in was not only the academic offering, but the atmosphere.

There was an openness in the way people engaged, from the very first email I exchanged with Dr. Lesley Hoggart and Margaret Davis in the Admissions Office, a sense of diversity that was not performative but lived, and an underlying promise that if I showed up fully, there would be room for me to grow. Looking back, I realise that this was my first act of intentionality. I did not yet have the language for it, but I was already beginning to design my path, not by knowing exactly where I wanted to go, but by recognising where I felt I could expand. Sometimes, that is enough.

Stepping in before feeling ready

I arrived a few weeks late because of visa delays (I was coming in from Tehran). By the time I stepped onto campus, everything had already begun. There was a sense of urgency, of needing to catch up, but also an invitation to step in, and I did. Very quickly, I understood that Middlesex was not just a place to attend lectures. It was a living community. I became involved in every way I could.

I represented my cohort, organised study groups, participated in research initiatives, and volunteered across campus. These were not strategic decisions at the time, they were instinctive. I followed what felt meaningful, and in doing so, I began to understand something that has shaped my entire career. Opportunities rarely announce themselves loudly. They reveal themselves through participation.

If you take one thing from this piece, let it be this. Do not wait to feel ready or to be invited. Join the group, reach out, express your interest, and then do the part that many people overlook. Follow through. Consistency and reliability are the critical pillars on which trust is built. Without trust, even the most promising opportunities remain unopened.

Learning to think, not just to perform

I completed my Master’s in Research Methods in Social Sciences, followed by a PhD at the intersection of social psychology and policy. These were rigorous, demanding, and intellectually expansive years, but what shaped me most was not only what I learned, it was how I was taught to think. I had the privilege of being supported by remarkable scholars.

Dr. Lesley Hoggart offered me my first research assistantship and took me under her wing with generosity and care, creating a space where I could build confidence before stepping into my own intellectual independence. Dr. Betsy Thom, my PhD Director of Studies, offered me a wealth of wisdom along the way and a sentence that has stayed with me for decades. As I was walking into my doctoral defence, she looked at me and said, “No one is supposed to know more than you do about your thesis. This is your brainchild.” In that moment, something shifted. I realised that I was not there to reproduce knowledge or simply produce another dissertation. I was there to generate knowledge, to develop a novel thesis, to question, refine, and contribute, and to trust that my voice had a place in the conversation.

Dr. Daniel Kelly was the third part of this triangle of support, and in his own way, he was a steady and encouraging presence along the journey. Not all support comes in the same form and learning to recognise that is part of the process. I should not forget to mention Chris and Waseema, who were my close friends and were there with me through ups and downs of the graduate school. You definitely need those allies as well. Together, these influences created an environment where thinking was not only encouraged but expected, and that expectation changed everything. I am sure you will find your own network of support wherever in your journey you are.

From literacy to fluency

During my PhD programme, I was awarded a research tutorship scholarship which allowed me to teach while continuing my studies. This experience deepened my learning in ways I could not have anticipated. I remember a principle that was shared with us during our training, that if someone is not understanding or is disengaged in your class, it is your responsibility to bring them into the learning experience and make sure they are engaged. This was not simply a teaching technique, it was a way of relating.

Years later, whether working with international organisations, advising companies, or serving in leadership roles, I carried this principle with me. It is not enough to invite people to the table, we must ensure they feel they belong so that we have the privilege of their engagement. This is where education moves from literacy to fluency. Literacy gives you knowledge, fluency allows you to live it with intention and impact.

Designing a career, not following one

Middlesex was foundational in my journey, but it was not the entirety of it. My path extended into clinical training, international work, and further academic and professional development across both the United Kingdom and the United States. I then worked across more than 40 countries which enriched my path in significant ways.

What Middlesex gave me was not a fixed direction, it gave me a way of navigating. It taught me how to think critically, how to integrate perspectives, and how to remain curious and genuinely interested even in the face of complexity. Most importantly, it taught me that a career is not something you find, it is something you design. Design requires intentionality.

You may not always know where you want to end up, but you can begin by understanding where you do not want to be. That clarity can be just as powerful. Pay attention to what attracts you, notice how you measure reward, be aware of the currencies involved, what you are investing and what you expect in return, and consider who you want to be surrounded by, who you want to serve, and the kind of impact you want to have. Even partial answers can begin to shape a meaningful path.

The discipline that changes everything

As you design your journey, it is equally important to honour your boundaries. Your time, your energy, your attention, and your resources are not infinite, they are investments. If you are unclear about your priorities, your actions will become fragmented, and when your actions are fragmented, those around you experience confusion. Clarity creates coherence. When you are clear about what matters, your actions align, and when your actions align, others know how to meet you. Have respect for your own boundaries, and have regard for the people you interact with along the way.

Use this time well

One of the most powerful aspects of being a student is proximity. While you are studying, it is much easier to reach out, to ask for guidance, to arrange meetings, to shadow others, and to explore different paths. Use this time intentionally. Ask for advice, be curious (because not knowing is expected of you as a student!), join professional organisations as a student member, and create opportunities if they do not yet exist. People are often more willing to help than you might imagine, but they need to see your willingness, your consistency, and your commitment. Give them that opportunity.

What truly stays with you

What I carry most vividly from my time at Middlesex are the relationships. The friendships formed in classrooms and corridors and the shared moments of discovery. More than twenty years later, I now live and work between the United Kingdom and the United States, serving a global community.

My work has been recognised through honours including the Clark Vincent Award from the California Association of Marriage and Family Therapists for advancing the field, Vanguard Award by Psychotherapy Networker, recognition from the BBC World Service for innovation, and being named a finalist for the British Council Alumni Award for Social Impact.

When I reflect on these milestones, I do not see them as isolated achievements. I see them as expressions of a way of thinking and being that was cultivated during my time at Middlesex and refined over the years that followed.

An invitation to design your own path

If you are reading this at the beginning of your journey, or somewhere in the middle of it, I would offer you this: do not reduce your university experience to a checklist. Let it shape you. Engage with your community, represent your peers, ask questions, create, contribute, and reflect. Design your path with intention, even if that intention begins with uncertainty. Show up consistently, reliably, and thoughtfully. Your time at university is not only about acquiring knowledge, it is about becoming someone who knows how to think, how to relate, and how to contribute. And perhaps most importantly, trust that your voice matters. It always has.

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Dr. Nasserzadeh's work has taken her to more than forty countries and has been featured on NPR, the BBC, ABC, CNN, New York Times, Times, CNBC, and in USA Today among others.

She is a TED speaker. internationally known for bridging personal intimacy, professional excellence, and intercultural fluency. She believes world peace can be built, one relationship at a time. Dr. Nasserzadeh has been a senior cultural advisor for governments, UN Agencies, academic institutions, and Fortune 500 companies.

You can read more about Dr. Nasserzadeh's achievements and find her books . You can also view her latest .

Find out more about research degrees at Middlesex University.